Five-Minute Friday: Stay

Some days I want to lay it all down

gently 

and quietly walk away. 

Return to the open spaces we once swam freely

among the sea of so many hours in the day

I had the luxury of wishing away 

the last few in the afternoon. 

Those days long passed

those long hours

used to scream at me

to do something significant

as I washed walls and windows and sticky fingers --

to be someone more than 

the stay-at-home mom, long-order cook 

and housewife extraordinaire.

And now as the hour hand races from number to number

and I scramble to make it from 

place to place

activity to activity

little body, to preschool body to strong arms

these short days whisper

to slow down 

return to  

that extraordinary ordinary

I'd so desperately wanted to escape. 

Everyday Life: On Vacation

 

"As the sun on summer days gladdens us with beams more warm and bright than at other times...so is it with the mercy of God; it hath its golden hours; its days of overflow, when the Lord magnifieth his grace."  - Charles Spurgeon

One glorious week spent beneath August sun on the sands of a tiny lake in Michigan, and I find myself full.

Full from a feast of gladness.

Every now and then we have to get brave

and brake

in order to break up this steady daily rhythms of the rushrushswoosh of time.

Every now and then

{despite the pull to just keep swimming through the currents}

life needs to be interrupted by

waves gently sweeping over sandy beach

toes immersed in clear water

laughter erupting from little lips

crickets singing in the crisp air of dusk

whispers uttered beneath stars, amid burning embers.

And then

like the golden summer light of August, of summer making way to fall

mercy begins to drip thick

like honey from a hive

as the heart hears

and the eyes see

and the lips confess

all of the small and beautiful blessings

we breeze over in the day to day

but realize in full

when we brake

and break

from the spin cycle of the everyday.

Bigger Picture Moment: Black Holes and Socks

My youngest, my just turned two year old, is playing intently just a few feet away from me as I sort laundry into piles.

I am wondering where the time has gone since my oldest was wearing the 2T clothing his younger brother now sports.

It's the first day* of every-day school for G, and I'm wallowing in the reality that black holes eat more than our socks -- they seem to have sucked away the past four years of our life together.

Underwear go in one pile, socks in another.

And speaking of socks -- uugh!

Socks!

How is it already time for the weather to mandate we wear socks?!

It's only September ... ohmygosh, it's already September.

Where did this year go, I bemoan in my head.

I hear an uprising of babble emerge from my little one; he's lining up his older brother's stuffed animals along the couch while making them talk and move and interact.

As I match the seems of a blue-striped shirt, I realize that E isn't just doing his normal play of line 'em up only to knock 'em off their feet.

He's play-playing -- with imagination and passion.

I abandoned my laundry ambitions, and I watch him babble away speaking his E-ese, as we call it, totally focusing 100 percent on what's unfolding before my eyes instead of intently focusing on the review-mirror glimpses of days past while folding clothes.

As I emerge from the black hole of time and socks, I see it.

I see time standing still before me, and realize the clock is offering me moments to just soak up my small boy, my not-so-baby baby.

This is the time to know E better, to gobble up who he is.

It is here. It is now. And it is fleeting if I think it away with thoughts of the past.

So I'm taking in every moment of it while it's here at my feet.

Every Thursday, we share the harvest of of intentional living by capturing a glimpse of the bigger picture through a simple moment. Our link up is at Alita's this week. Won't you join us?

{*This moment happened last Wednesday.}

Thinking, that's all: So We Dance and Sing

My baby sister is getting married in two days, and it's all starting to become very real.



These past few months we've all trying to make sorts of what that means for her and for our family and for us, I think, too.

Because after having her live here for the better part of a year, she kind of has become part of everyday life in an ever-decreasing way, and, of course, that's as it should be when a woman grows up and out and into new skin, combining her life with the man she loves.

It's as it should be, I remind myself when she's not here for dinner or whatever else.

And maybe because I'm not great with big changes, and maybe because I cling to memories with the grip of a kid grasping a beloved doll, I've been focusing more on plans and preparations for her bachlorette party and the details -- the outfits and the gifts and the speech {Oh MY WORD THE SPEECH!} and the mustaches on a stick than the actual feelings that swirl and swell in my heart when I think of my little sister getting married.

And it's very unlike all three of the weddings I officiated for her in the backyard when she was four and dolled up in the fancy, ruffled dress she wore to our dad's wedding reception saying I do to the little red-headed neighbor boy we all adored.

Like, really getting married ... to a grown man and in that union she gains a business and a home of her own and a car and babies {someday, no rush}.

And these thoughts here -- the newness of what's to be coupled with the nostalgia of a childhood that's been and a year of togetherness as adults living life in the same house, well, it's enough to leave me a little breathless, forgetting to actually soak in this moment, this here, this now.

Because just as busyness steals away the days, so, too, does living in yesterday and tomorrow.

There's a snap back to reality when G, who has been focusing his energy on the practical, too, by intently practicing his sweet dance moves every chance he gets, begs me to turn on some "boy music" {code for male singing voices} that's good for dancing.

Like Ice Ice Baby {introduced to him by a certain sister of mine}.

Thankfully, he willing rocks out when Jimmy Eat World rocks the house and sways melodically along to Death Cab for Cutie and the like .

And it's good -- this rocking, this swaying of the house by song and lyric and melody because it means that the TV is off. {Did I mention that E now sneaks off while G and I are playing or cleaning or cooking and turns on not just the TV but also Netflix? Yeah -- kid is smart.}

But, also, there's goodness because it means that we're immersed in the present enjoying the music, the movements, the beauty of right here and right now, which is where I really I want to be.



I want stand strong in all of this and soak it up -- her wedding and these long days but short years of the boys' smallness -- while it's happening instead of reliving it in fractured pieces of memories.

So we dance and sing right here, right now not just as practice for the wedding, but as practice in really living within the actual moments of both the ordinary and extraordinary days.

Introducing Simple Swaps!

Saturdays around Undercover Mother are getting a little makeover for the fall!

After talking with a lot of friends and finding we all want to live more inspired, intentional, healthier lives, the wheels in my brain began turning about how we could all turn those ideals into values that we can live out in our daily lives.

Thus, Simple Swaps was born!

The first Saturday of each month, I'll introduce one Simple Swaps as a way encouraging my friends here to find the time and resources to make simple changes aimed at fostering a healthier, more inspired, intentional lifestyle.

Each swap will:
1. Take 15 minutes or less to accomplish
2. Be free to implement or boast overall, long-haul savings
3. Focus on improving health/eco-friendliness, being good stewards of our resources or fostering a creative and intentional life.

Some weeks, all three will be accomplished in only 15 minutes!

Good things to remember:
1. While making the swap be sure to take a before and after picture.
2. Post your Simple Swap pictures and the details -- YOUR story surrounding that specific swap. {Please link back to the Simple Swap post here at Undercover Mother in your post!}
3. Come back here to Undercover Mother, link your post and be automatically entered to win a something awesome that will help you in your journey and aid in helping your Simple Swap stick.

Saturday, Sept. 3, our Simple Swap will be transforming a cluttered area into a Creative Oasis in 15 minutes or less for no cost at all. Come back for the details and to get inspiration and a how-to guide for making your own Creative Oasis {in a permanent or temporary space!}.

Share the Love: Organization Set Giveaway from Blue Sky

**THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED. CONGRATULATIONS TO MICHELLE FROM INTENTIONAL ME!**
Intentional living is complicated by busyness.

The busyness, I've found, robs me of our everyday moments.

With my always-running mind and a full list of commitments, I've found that I can no longer rely only on memory to keep our family moving in the right directions at the right times on the right days and soak up the moments as they happen.

After this realization, I decided to make a concerted effort to give my mind a breather; I've taken the better part of this summer to try and imbed some organization into our lives so that come fall, when our activities become much more structured and scheduled, I will be able to enjoy our actual down time and the moments that accompany without becoming consumed by other thoughts of other committments I may or may not be forgetting.

My first attempt at organization began with a monthly calendar for our kitchen. I actually caved last fall and bought a Blue Sky hanging wall calendar {partly because it was pretty} after I asked my husband for the fourth day in a row if it was Thursday. {And I was totally serious.}

And that has helped; but I admittedly need a level of organization that goes beyond simply knowing the day of the week -- that's where my Blue Sky Day planner is helping.

With a monthly calendar at located at the beginning of each month's tab followed by actual day spaces alloted for detailed plans, I've become more successful at keeping my days straight and not overbooking our weeks ...

when I remember to use it.

{Why, yes, I am keeping it real here.} :)

I haven't used a daily planner since my senior year of college, partly because I rarely have the time it takes to pencil in all of the activities at each moment each activity is scheduled {hands full with chasing kids} and partly because I have to remember to bring said planner places.

{I'm lucky to remember shoes for E.}

Also, effectively using a planner takes diligence for me -- it really requires discipline.

As I've been disciplining myself, I've come to really like the way my planner is structured. All of my lists -- who to call, what to do, what to buy -- are in one place. All of my plans are in one place. One very pretty place.



I do not have a purse overflowing with sticky notes any more. I'm not desperately trying to recall what I think I may have forgotten {mostly}. And my iPhone isn't tethered to my hand at every moment of the day.

I like that.

So, I guess there's a reason why these planner thingys are popular. They actually work.

Probably, if you're like me and you live in the real world, you're also looking for some organizational help this fall.

Maybe a Blue Sky organization set might help control the chaos of the school year and help foster more moments of intentional living?

Simply leave a comment telling me your best organization tip {or what color your toenails are painted -- really any comment is fine}.

*I'll randomly select a winner Tuesday, August 2
*The Blue Sky organization kit includes one 8x10 planner, magnetic grocery checklist pad, mouse pad, and door notes
*Be sure to include your email address; I had to redraw the winner three times last giveaway.
*For an additionaly entry, you can like Blue Sky on Facebook. {Leave a comment saying you did.}

Blue Sky gifted me with an organizational set and offered to give away a set, too. While this is a sponsored post, my opinions and thoughts are my own. As mentioned, I'd already been using Blue Sky items in my daily life, so I thought my friends here might find them useful, too.

Bigger Picture Moment: Instead

Thunder is rumbling a deep moan in the near distance while a web of lightening spreads across the sky, dances in the horizon.

An early morning thunderstorm lulls a snugly toddler back into slumber, and I quiet, creak, sneak out of bed at the beckoning of a preschooler's loud whisper of hunger and subsequent grumbling from his small stomach.

Holding my hand, he all but drags me out of my room and down the stairs.

We talk thunder. We talk rain. We talk lightening on the way down in hushed voices.

Heading toward the kitchen, I try to talk breakfast while pulling out the rolled oats, but he instead pulls me over to the big red rocking chair in the living room.

"I think I need mommy snuggles more than my tummy wants breakfast," he says through an overzealous whisper. "I think we better snuggle instead."

And so it waits, breakfast, uncooked atop the stove, because willing preschool arms and hearts don't.

Have you caught a glimpse of the bigger picture through a simple moment? Share with us at Melissa's today, and then encourage others on the journey of intentional living.

Sabbath Experiement: Why We Need Rest

This is the second of a three-part series about our family's journey in experimenting with taking a day of rest every week.

Sabbath Experiment: Part One: Who has Time to Rest, Really? {signs of needing a sabbath}

This week, Suzannah of So Much Shouting So Much Laughter and I have collaborated our thoughts on why we've found we need this weekly deep rest; we've color coded our words, with Suzannah in teal and Hyacynth in green.

****
"How are you?" they ask.

"Busy!" we reply, wearing weariness like a badge.

We live in an era of constant motion. Overscheduled and underslept, we're running on empty, tethered to the technology that promised to ease our lives but somehow delivered more obligations.

A wearer of the busy badge front and center on my chest, I've long wished for 26-hour days, daydreaming about an added two hours to each day, giving me the time I need to {fill in the blank}. I can assure the word "rest" was not on my list of words for that blank.

Before my family began the Sabbath Experiment, I constantly wondered why I couldn't fit all of our activities into a seven-day time period.

Why couldn't I have a super-clean house, healthy, home-cooked meals, head up a few different organizations, spend time with the family and read my Bible all while doing things I enjoy?

I saw other women who looked like they were successfully doing it, so what was my problem? Why couldn't I keep it all together and smile through it all?

We were created for so much more than the rat race. When we set aside a day to rest, we acknowledge that God is in control, and the world does not revolve around us or our efforts.

Sabbath-keeping, at its heart, is about humility. It's a command, but more than that, the sabbath is a gift and a blessing.

Sabbath exists to honor the God who rested from creation, but it is for us, too: God desires to renew his people, replacing our worry with joy.

As we rest from work and take time for recreation, we are re-created by God, who refreshes and prepares us anew for continued work and ministry. When we set aside a day for worship, play, and rest, we allow God to fulfill his promises to us:

"If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath and from doing as you please on my holy day, if you call the Sabbath a delight and the LORD's holy day honorable, and if you honor it by not going your own way and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, then you will find your joy in the LORD, and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob." The mouth of the LORD has spoken. (Isaiah 58:13-14)

After reading His promise regarding Sabbath, I've no longer found it ironic that our family had actually gained more time thought we'd essentially erased a day from our calendar every week by designating it as a day for rest.

We now have more time to laugh. More time to nap, recharge for the week to come. More time to enjoy each other. And even more time during the week to fulfill those commitments I'd been struggling to accomplish.

Of course, Sabbath essentially has forced me weekly to re-examine commitments. I've really had to prioritize my days and engage in the most important interactions -- which then leaves little time for idle distractions that seek to lure me away from what I've deemed most important.

Practicing Sabbath means committing to intentional living daily; it means having a decided heart about what actually is most important in life because there simply isn't time to dip our fingers into the shallow pools of the unimportant.

In the whittling down of commitments, I'd also discovered another reason I couldn't fit all of life into a week's time frame: My life rhythm was off.

I was essentially trying to dance a four-step salsa to two-beat song, neglecting sleep, relaxation and just plain time well spent with the people I loved. Enjoyment of life was fleeting and replaced often with shoulds and musts, as I hurried from one activity to another, sporadically entering into the fullness of each moment and the beauty found in the everyday.

God, our Father, gave us an example of what our life rhythms are to look like, and rest coupled with enjoyment was part of His example:

"And on the seventh day God finished the work that he had done, and he rested on the seventh day from all the work that he had done. So God blessed the seventh day and hallowed it, because on it God rested from all the work that he had done in creation." Genesis 2: 2-3

Our all-mighty Creator didn't abandon work on the seventh day because He was too weary to continue; rather, he was modeling enjoyment -- the breathing in of His vibrantly colored sunsets, delicate flowers, turquoise seas -- all things we miss when we're too busy trying to do it all, be it all.

He was showing us a rhythm -- our life rhythm.

In surrendering our schedules and priorities, God pours out the thing our grasping hands cannot reach alone, no matter how far or fast we run.

Joy is found in the ancient practice of sabbath-keeping. A balm to the world-weary soul.

Part Three of the Sabbath Experiment: How to make Sabbath a Reality: A Simple Guide will be published, hopefully, next Monday. :)

Everyday Life: Lately

I've been living outside of my head.

Lately.

Doing things I normally don't do.

Eat a cinnamon roll for breakfast with a glass of hot steaming almond oolong.

Stay up past the boys' bedtime to enjoy extra giggling and inevitably tackling.

Pass up paid writing assignments to instead take a chance on creative endeavors.

Leave days of the week free of commitments so as to enjoy a spur-of-the-moment date with the littles and our friends.

And the less I live inside my mind, planning and scheduling and rationalizing and analyzing and scrunching and thinking thinking thinkingthinkingthinking until I've thunk myself out of any space at all ...

the more I find that I like our weeks.

Our days.

Our moments.

Lately, I think, I've been living inside the moments.

Instead of just {always, constantly, obssessively} thinking about them.